This Week in News: 6/13/19
| S:1 E:23Rodge hops on the gossip train in this week’s episode of Retrotone News Minute. He divulges the latest in Celebrity Feuds featuring a Peace Treaty between Taylor Swift and Katy Perry; the Corporate Giant Break Up between FedEx and Amazon a.k.a. Fedmazon; the Twitter smack down between Justin Beiber and Tom Cruise; and we remember our favorite fuzzy friend, Otto the Otter passes. Let’s get on the chatter!
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RETROTONE NEWS
Episode 23: June 13, 2019
TITLE: This Week in News: 6/13/19
HEADLINE: It’s all about the blabbermouths in this week’s Retrotone Gossip Edition!
EPISODE DESCRIPTION:
Rodge hops on the gossip train in this week’s episode of Retrotone News Minute. He divulges the latest in Celebrity Feuds featuring a Peace Treaty between Taylor Swift and Katy Perry; the Corporate Giant Break Up between FedEx and Amazon a.k.a. Fedmazon; the Twitter smack down between Justin Beiber and Tom Cruise; and we remember our favorite fuzzy friend, Otto the Otter passes. Let’s get on the chatter!
INTRO
Here is a snappy summary of the news – a weekly digest of the latest events and happenings at home and abroad. I’m your host, Rodge Bigsby and this is your Retrotone News Minute!
Greetings Mr. & Mrs. America and all the blabbermouths on E! ... Let’s get on the chatter!
1) LET’S GET ON THE GOSSIP TRAIN…
Look out Branjelina, Fedmazon has got you beat!
Amazon becomes the EX in FedEx. In a recent market showdown, FedEx has decided to drop Amazon as one of the e-commerce giant’s Express customers. This break-up comes during a difficult period for FedEx, and at first it might seem odd for a delivery firm to part ways deliberately with the nation’s biggest e-commerce player. However, Amazon is growing its own shipping network and pushing the envelope in terms of ever-shrinking shipping guarantees. This forced Fed-Ex and UPS to spend heavily on their own self-improvements… turning Amazon from friend to foe. Let’s hope Fedmazon practices conscious uncoupling and ends things on good terms… #ThanksGwyneth.
2) IN CELEBRITY GOSSIP...
A Declaration of Peace Between Two Pop Stars… With a Plate of Cookies!
In a bold move to further reconcile the longtime feud between Taylor Swift and Katy Perry, a Peace Deal via Instagram has commenced. This week, Perry posted a photo of a plate of chocolate chip cookies with “Peace at last” written in red icing above the treats, marking the end of this cold war. Two sprinkled peace signs were also drawn on each side of the celebratory icing phrase. But that wasn’t all: Perry also included the geotag location of “Let’s Be Friends” in the post — which had some fans hoping that it would be the title of the singers’ upcoming collab. Taylor and Katy… allies at last.
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3) IN TWITTER DRAMA:
Justin Bieber broke the internet this week, announcing he wanted to break Tom Cruise. Yep. In a bizarre turn of events, Beiber challenged Cruise to a mixed martial arts fight. The absurd tweet read:
“I wanna challenge Tom Cruise to fight in the octagon. Tom if you dont take this fight your scared and you will never live it down. Who is willing to put on the fight? @danawhite ?”
Not to call Justin a “Baby,” but this odd instigation might be ‘Mission Impossible’ for the young pop star as fans have their hypothetical odds on Cruise, who actually has over 20 years of martial arts training underneath his black belt. It’s unclear what sparked Bieb’s Beef with Tom. Is it a prank? Or maybe a publicity stunt? Nobody knows! One thing’s clear: Rodge thinks Cruise could give Justin a mean bruise!
4) IN REQUIEM: (*Melancholy Music)
Millions Mourn the Loss of Otto the Otter
This month marks the passing of poor, orphaned Otto. The beloved Otter of Kingston, who brought joy to millions in his brief life, passed away at the Tennessee zoo last month. After some vile visitors threw food into his enclosure, Otto unassumingly downed the snack. The human food was toxic to his little otter body, and he succumbed on May 30, 2019.
"Otto was beloved by park staff and guests alike," the zoo said in a facebook post. "A cheerful creature, he could often be found swimming or playing with toys in his pool, even when it was snowing outside."
Poor Otto will never, swim, splash, or spread a smile on a visitor’s face again. Rest in peace, dear friend! Your tenacious spirit lives on in our hearts!
5) AND NOW ONTO BIGSBY’S BEAT OF THE WEEK
With the gossip train in full force, this beat goes out to Fedmazon in light of their stirring split. FedEx just did not see this break up coming, I’m sure of it. Sometimes, people - I mean large corporate domains - change their ways. I bring you, the unforgettable, Billie Holiday to sing her sad song, “You’ve Changed”...
6) SIGN OFF STATEMENT:
And that's one for the Republic! I'm your host Rodge Bigsby and this has been news from Retrotone, a service of Evergreen Podcasts.
Until next time… make a good day!
Yoo-Ha! Hashtag, RodgeBigsby.
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